Swimmertainment

Well it's about dang time that I updated with some swimmertainment for y'all. If you are new to the blog, swimmertainment is the every-so-often update with ridiculous stories or lessons learned while swimming laps at the local Rec Center. A few things I've learned thus far:

1. The locker room has a lot of naked old ladies...as in 65 and older. They have no problem be naked and having conversations with random strangers while they blow dry their hair half bent over in a hand dryer.

2. The lane dividers will try to eat you...or really they will just re-break your already broken pinky finger.

3. If you are short, don't try to swim as fast as your super athletic, tall, fast swimming friends in the next lane. It doesn't work. Yes, I'm talking about you, Rob O'Donnell. For every one of Rob's strokes, I had like six. Killin' me.

4. There is always someone swimming in an inappropriate bathing suite. If you are not on a swim team, guys please do not wear a speedo. Gals, bikinis are not for lap swimming! Just sayin'. 



Here's my swimmertainment story for this post. It was about a month or so ago that this story took place. I was coming out of the pool area and into the locker room. As I was walking across the locker room I hear someone come in the opposite door and head to the restroom. Not a big deal. I get to my locker and as I'm pulling out my stuff to change, I stop to take a sip of water from my water bottle and this gal comes waling out of the bathroom stall and I could almost not believe what I was seeing. The gal is in her mid-40s atleast and she is walking into the locker room area with her hunter green corduroys unzipped and unbuttoned, pulled down to her mid thigh, underware is nowhere to be seen. She's got like 4 huge bags in her hands, crazy big hair, and the loudest pair of boots I've ever heard. And she suddenly stops in the middle of the locker room, bags in hand and pants down, she starts belting out "And I dug my key into the side of his pretty little souped up 4 wheel drive, carved my name into his leather seats. I took a Louisville slugger to both headlights, slashed a hole in all 4 tires. Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats!" Really Carrie Underwood? Well aren't you a diva! Now miss diva, would you mind pulling up your pants and take your singing to the bar for karaoke night? Great, thanks. I seriously was like, "Did that just happened?" I gave the gal next to me that look and she gave it right back. I definitely had a good chuckle at that image often since it has taken place. That gal was some kind of bold.

Hope you enjoyed this installment of swimmertainment!

All in.