Bah Humbug.

I'm grumpy. I've been grumpy all day. I can't seem to get out of this funk. I know why I'm grumpy, but I don't know why I'm this grumpy and why I can't seem to get out of this unpleasant mood. At the end of last week I got news that I did not get another YL property job that I applied for and really wanted. That's been weighing on me today. I'm really tired of being told no for jobs in general, but especially to those that I really want. Don't get me wrong, I am excited that I have this part time job at the clinic and super thankful that they thought of me and hired me. However this is not my dream job. It's not full time and it's not Property Staff. I think part of me (a really big part) is scared of getting stuck in a job that is just so-so in my opinion. Don't get me wrong, I love the clinic and the staff there. I love the mission of the clinic. It really just boils down to the fact that it's a transition job and I know that from the start. I think the bad mood has also something to do with this messed up weather. One day it's warm and sunny the next day it's freezing the next day it's raining and warm and today is overcast and cold and tomorrow is suppose to be sunny and 78. I'm feeling a bit stuck. I'm feeling like I'm never going to get to my goal weight. I feel like I'm never going to get the job I want. As I write this, I have tears in my eyes and I'm trying not to cry because I just feel so discouraged. So stuck. This journey is hard and I'm ready for it to be done and over.

4.23.13 Day 214, Lost:1 Total:62, Weight: 128

Tonight I am taking pictures of clothes I've shrunk out of. They will be posted in the next few days - hopefully. Thanks for letting me vent y'all.

All in.